charcoal window panes

And I'm tired of all of this
Creating these realities that don't exist
Make believing that I believe what I have made
A thought crosses the void to nest on my mind
Flutter its wings and pollenate the field of desperation
This field full of longing and desire
For the sun to shine through my charcoal
Window panes
I refuse to give in
Because it makes too much sense
I refuse to clean the window panes
And I'm tired of all of this
Believeing in my intellect to define the world
Classifying and justifying my pitiful existence
There lies the love I had hoped for
The union between the Father and His Son
Comradery unsurpassed, bound by loyalty
Connection between the Potter and His clay
Vessel
I refuse to give in
Because it seems too simplistic
I refuse to clean the window panes
And You, being who You are
Take the Windex to my soul and wipe away
The charcoal off my window panes
Allowing the light of your love to shine through
And You smash the clay and start anew
Pain tears my soul and in vegence I lash out
As my fist full of rage crashes through streak-free
Window panes
You refuse to let go
Because You know what I will become
You refuse to let go
Fitting the broken glass into Your loving frame